It happens every year for me- that mid-season funk. That time where you've been "in it" for a few months now, and you are still loving your team and loving the season...but you're also kinda over it at the same time, and just want your husband back.
For me, this funk manifests as feeling resentful for the unbalance of time I put in versus what I receive, feeling unappreciated, feeling my tank is just about on empty, or even feeling depressed.
I have heard from other coach wives who have been living this life for 20+ years that this still happens to them, so it makes me feel like this is a normal occurrence, and maybe other people feel that way too. Do you?
While I am currently in that place, I know it's not a place I want to stay in and wallow in. I don't like feeling down or depressed, so I have created a list of things I can do to combat this, and I'm hoping some of this can help you too, if that's where you are at in the season right now.
1. Do more things for you
Whether that's getting a sitter and getting together with your girlfriends, going on a trip to see your friends or family, or even a little retail therapy! For me, exercising is something that I do for me, but in order to find a way to spice it up a bit, I could change things up and attend a group fitness class, or something along those lines just to get out of my normal routine.
2. Get involved
Whether that's getting more involved with the team, doing more with your kids, or your church, or whatever. Sometimes for me if I am feeling resentful towards our sport for all the time it takes away from my relationship, if I just go to practice or have the team over more, it helps me feel more involved and puts our "why" in front of me more. BUT if this is something that is causing you stress or maybe even putting you in that mid-season funk, maybe try scaling it back a bit. That's also been me in years past...
3. Tell your coach how you are feeling
I read something from a coach's wife recently about not trying to bring things up during the season that might add extra pressure to our husbands, but I'm not really the type of person who can avoid talking about something that's on my mind. Maybe that's wrong, I don't know. But I do know that our relationship always improves when we communicate and work to make things better. If he doesn't know that something is bothering me, then how is he supposed to fix it? And if I don't communicate with him about it, then I am only going to keep getting frustrated about, which isn't fair to him. So I say tell them how you are feeling.
4. Try to take advantage of the moments that you have
While it's not a lot during the season, there are pockets of moments where time can be soaked up. Sometimes we can be too distracted by the other things going on in our lives (or even our phones) to take advantage of the people right in front of us, so I know for me it's important to not take those moments for granted. Even if those moments are really only 30 seconds...
Being in-season means you give a lot to your husband and your sport, and maybe don't receive a lot in return. And while we can't control the actions of others, we can control our own actions and how we choose to think and feel about our situations. If you feel like no one is investing in you, then make sure that you are investing in you, in whatever ways that fill your cup.
Please tell me...am I the only one who goes through this in-season funk?
If you experience this too, please comment with ways that help you overcome it!